I’ve gone months now waking up and feeling present and available for life. I’ve been fully embracing all the goodness, all the growth, all the love. I’ve been square in the middle of rhythm within my peak season of spring. A season that brings me immense joy and fills me with the sweet nectar of life. But spring ended for me yesterday.
The solstice was a little less than two weeks ago but one can always continue to feel the prior season’s energies for about two weeks or so into the new season. And with the start of July, those energies have completely shifted for me. With the changing of the guard, I now wake with a distinct and familiar feeling – that of change.
It’s the feeling I had throughout last year as I went through the death of my relationship and moved out of my home. It persisted for what felt like eons. I remember waking and thinking, “When will this go away? When will I wake up and feel excited about life again?” Understandably, the distinct feeling of change isn’t a pleasant one. It’s uncomfortable. It foretells unknown seasons ahead. And uncertainty feels scary.
The thought machine gets amped up and rolling, asking questions like, “What if I don’t like what’s to come?”, “How will I know what’s next?”, “Am I capable of facing what arrives?”. These are all serious questions and concerns. All of which is to be expected when sitting squarely in the void. The void is the “don’t know” space. It’s the space where, if we let it, our minds will run rampant, weaving scary as hell stories. It can be chaotic and messy. But that’s not the only way.
The void space can also be peaceful. It can be a place of complete surrender and relaxing back into the deep unknown with complete faith in Spirit to supply at the right time and in the right way. This, of course, takes practice. One must be adept at catching those rogue thoughts that will get underway without you even noticing. And before you know it, you’re in the chaos of void instead of the peace.
What makes the void space potentially chaotic versus peaceful is the fact that it at once contains every possibility and no possibility at all. It’s the place where all of the energy of life exists before it takes form into something recognizable and definitive. It’s pure potential. It’s a high level of energy that could either destroy or create powerful and beautiful things in the world. Therefore, without conscious attention, this energy will latch on to the overriding sentiment one carries and either wreak havoc or pulse peacefulness.
Working with the void space this morning, I acknowledge the fears that arise about not knowing what’s next. This indicates to me that I have an opportunity to surrender to Spirit. I surrender my plans, my ideas, my assumptions, my expectations. I give gratitude, instead, for what I do have at this moment now.
Today, and in the days ahead, as feelings arise about the change in seasons, I’ll relax back into the peacefulness of the void. I’ll listen for the quiet rhythms that pulse like a gently flowing river through a thick forest deep in the wilds. I’ll nurture my heart and love my body. I’ll trust my path, especially when I don’t know where it leads.